Thru this parenting thing, I mean?! Sometimes I feel so inadequate! If you are a parent reading this blog, do you ever feel like that?! There are a few things I hope for in my kids, that they love God, that they love each other, and that they love others. Of course I also hope that they excel in their schooling or activities, and that they are in general well behaved kids, but if I can accomplish those first few things, then I think the others will maybe fall into place. I am placing myself in the world of failure right now, and I hate it. I know it’s just a funk I am in, and I know that in a few days things will be easier – it just seems to be the natural cycle here for us, but I hate the here and now. What does this stem from, you ask? Well, today the gymnastics instructor had to pull me and another mom aside and said that some not so nice words were being exchanged between one of my girls and the other girl. The words “Jesus doesn’t love you anymore” or something to that matter. Our gymnastics instructor is a Christian, so I don’t think she took that lightly and nor do I. I was steaming mad. I had a major talk with “said” child about it, and about how it hurt me to hear my child speak like that to anyone and how that is not true because Jesus/God made everyone on earth and loves everyone – and how we know that to be true. So hard to explain why that is such a terrible thing to say to someone. I just feel like I am doing an inadequate job at raising my kids. Often times I feel like we don’t have control of them and that they whine and complain too much, and I don’t know how to make it stop without yelling at them (which I am sure is not the way to teach them). The disrespect they have for Kyle and I at times is not acceptable to me, but I don’t know how to teach them that – I tell them, but it doesn’t seem to sink in. Are they too young to really get it yet? Am I expecting too much out of them for their age? Just some of the things I am struggling with right now. I know in the scheme of life and in comparison to what some moms are struggling with right now, it is sooooo not a big thing, and again…this too shall pass.
I am still without a job, I think I am going on 4 weeks now. It' is funny how when I was working I always thought "I think I will get bored staying at home all week”, and now I am thinking quite opposite. I wish I was bored! We have definitely been keeping busy! I always used to chuckle when I would hear retired people talk about how they are more busy in retirement than they were while working. I never understood how that can be, but now I understand! I think you just busy yourself with other things! I don’t miss having to get out so early in the morning with the three girls, but I miss working just a little bit. I have had more time to workout and take care of myself, though, which I love! Money/budgeting is tighter of course, but it helps a little now that we don’t need to buy diapers, and I have still be doing my coupon saving as well! Today I ran to Family Fare during gymnastics because I had a $10 register coupon that I needed to use and I needed just a few things. I bought 2 Tropicana OJ’s, 2 Classico pasta sauces, a box of lasagna noodles, and a box of texas toast and I paid only .48 cents! I was grinning from ear to ear walking out of there, and I think the cashier and bagger lady thought I was robbing the place, but with the $10 Catalina coupon and a coupon for most of the other items, it was all legit, and the grocery store still gets the money back from the companies of the coupons! It’s a win-win! Last week I did Meijer and got just a TON of stuff for under $80!
And of course I have new fun LO’s to show you! What would a post by me be without some layouts?!
These first two are made with Shabby Miss Jenn Designs:
And this batch is done with mostly The-Lilypad goodies
And this is just another for my Disney album:
Ciao! Here’s to a better end to the week than the beginning to the week!
MandaKay
4 comments:
I totally get what you mean. I don't know if it's a generational thing or what but I must have grown up with a little more fear of adults than my kids. I recall disliking sunday school, but I didn't want to hurt anyones feelings, my parents or Jesus. Now my kids will begin complaining on Saturday night "oh no tomorrow's sunday. I don't wanna go to church!" In my mind I'm failing and someday their going to rebel and stop going to church. They love listening to Bible stories at home, listening to wjq, talking about God, and praying, but the thorn is always sunday school.
you will make it- hang in there! with prayer and grace you will make it through. none of us are the perfect parent, and no one has the perfect kid and we ALL have flaws, sin and fall short. i thank God that your child has a mommy that cares enough to point out her sin and set her straight. too many parents don't. so i know you will make it!
So if you just change the names in the story it could be mine! (Except for the ridiculous coupon savings... I haven't mastered that yet!) But seriously, about the kids... I quite often feel like a failure too and that I react too much by yelling. I wish I had all the answers. I wish I could be more intentional instead of reactional! I'm sorry I'm no help but just know you're not alone!
I can completely relate on the kid thing. My girls are 7 and 4, and I have the exact same issues with them as you described having with your own girls. What gets me, is that mine can never "remember" what I've told them, even when it seems like I've told them the same exact thing hundreds of times, but can recite, verbatim no less, things they saw on TV or in movies a year ago.
To be perfectly honest, my life as a parent isn't even close to what I had pictured it would be, and I have moments of feeling like a failure as a mom on an almost daily basis. But then something will happen that completely surprises me, and I think maybe I'm not doing such a "bad job" after all.
My husband, our girls, and I went on a local-ish vacation (playing tourist in our home state). The girls' grandparents had given them some spending money, so we allowed them to go to the gift shop at one of the tourist-y places we had stopped at. I reminded the girls to say "thank you" (which I do wish they would just say on their own without having to be reminded most times), and the cashier commented about what polite daughters I had. Her comment made me smile, but also caught me off guard as well and made me wonder if there are parents who don't see the value in teaching their children to be polite and kind.
So basically, all this rambling just for me to say that I don't have the answers, but you're definitely not alone!
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