How was everyone's weekend? When I look back at mine I say it was good. At moments - not so much though. Fri. night we decided to go to Main Street Pub in Allendale. Not a GREAT experience food and service wise, but it did not help that Selah was a nightmare. Kyle and I are basically thinking we will never eat out with kids again! I know we say that all the time, but honestly - it is just NOT worth it. It is pure stress and you can't enjoy your meal, nor can the poor people who are burdened by sitting by us. I do need to stress that my kids have grown up with eating out - at least once a week. You'd think they would be used to it. Selah is just at a BAD age when it comes to sitting and eating and being quiet. The girl has a loud annoying voice. I mean that in the nicest way that i can. LOL. She is just a stinker lately and I am not sure how to deal with it. Any suggestions from you great mothers out there would be greatly appreciated and NOT taken in a personal or bad way at all. I know many of my faithful blog readers are great patient mothers (Nina, Janet, Tammy, Kimmy, Sarah, & Lynette - JUST TO NAME A FEW). My main prayer lately is knowing how to deal with my children and having the will power to stick with a technique. I feel lately like it is out of control and I don't enjoy motherhood at this stage. I know that that is a horrible thing to say, but I am at least being honest. Mothering is HARD. No one really told me this before having kids - I should have known before having my third. Don't get me wrong - my kids aren't hellions - our house is not at all like the homes I see on SuperNanny or Nanny911. Kyle and I tend to balance things and agree on things pretty much together, which is a HUGE help! I just feel like maybe I can change something to help my kids change. They fight a bit when I am just home with them. Not when they are with other people luckily so even my family might not believe me on this one. Our main problem is in the morning before I head to work and then on days I am home with them. Anyway - enough of my ranting - got way off track there. So Kyle and I will be taking advantage of curb=side pickup a lot more now I think. We don't eat out every night by any means, but it is nice on either Fri. or Sat. to not have to cook and clean up the floor under the highchairs for a change!
Sat. we worked a bit on a list of things we had to do. Mow, fill bird feeder, water garden, etc...
After Selah's nap we headed out to the hospital lab to get Selah's blood drawn to check her hemoglobin - maybe has low iron. We should get the results today I would think. She just might need to get on iron drops. Then we ran a bunch of other errands like shipping something, Sam's Club run, etc... Home for afternoon naps and then headed to my mom's for a family reunion. Good times with cousins and family! The kids were in their glory playing all night!
Sunday was great - we went to early service to hear Kyle's Grandpa (who is a Reverend) sing special music. He is 87 ans still sings just beautifully. This guys voice is amazing. Just him speaking gives me chills. Very low clear voice. Selah went to nursery and Braelyn came into church with us. She asked after the singing if it was time for Sunday School. I told her that service doesn't have a Sunday School during the service, so then she asked to go by Selah. I couldn't resist so we actually got to sit thru the sermon in peace. It was about blessing those who persecute us. A good example was how the amish community that had 7 children murdered within the last year or so - they blessed the family of the murderer. An amazing and hard thing to do. So it was a great sermon and a good reminder in life! After church we actually came home - home by 10:30am - soooo unusual! My parents didn't have Sunday lunch and Kyle's mom was having us at night. We did a steak and potato dinner (my fave) and then the girls napped and we listened/read the bible for 2+ hours to get caught up on our old testament part of our Bible in a Year challenge. We are still three weeks behind on the old testament, but totally caught up on New Testament and Psalms and Proverbs. Not bad I guess, but would love to be totally caught up! Around 4:30 we headed to Kyle's parents who live on a little lake. The kids love to swim and we had a very good dinner and time with family. Again - the girls were good with their cousins playing and swimming! I LOVE having all our family so close! So blessed!
Not much going on this week. Work today, play date tomorrow at park, maybe the county fair at night b/c it's the only night we could make it and it happens to be kids day. Wed. packing up for camping, and Thur. we head north about a 1/2 hr to camp with friends! weather shows some rain, but we hope it is not too bad - maybe just at night b/c we do need it ever so badly here!
I feel like my posts are just so boring - basically just giving you a rundown on our life. I guess that is why I called it Everday Life - LOL! No pics today - maybe tomorrow - took quite a few this weekend. I have two LO's in progress too so those should be posted soon too!
I do have some exciting scrapping news that I am not sure I can post yet!!! Huge thing to me and hopefully I can share soon and tell you why it is so big for me!!! Stay Tuned!
Last, but not least. If any of you have a GREAT parenting book you think I should read please do tell. I am hoping to read during naps while camping since no computer time there - so if you have a suggestion that I can pick up from library that would be great!!!
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11 comments:
I TOTALLY understand where you're coming from. My "baby" will be 5 tomorrow. She is going off to kindergarten in 3 weeks and I finally feel like they are manageable in public. However, now I'm going out more which is giving me guilt of a different kind.
As much as possible, let the kids work things out between themselves. Just because she had the toy first doesn't mean he doesn't get a turn but that's not your fight. I like Parenting With Love and Logic, but have to take it with a grain of salt as well. You know your kids better than anyone so you know when thier fusses are legitimate, when they need some extra mommy/daddy time, or when they're just plain done. You don't get the "need mommy intensively" stage back- take that as you will. It's nerve wracking now, but when it's gone (someone tells me) you'll miss it.
Take advantage of nursery when you can get it, church or otherwise, and get a sitter or enlist help from family when you can to go see a movie with your hubby, or alone! Being away makes being together not as intense.
Good luck and hang in there!
We had a similar issue with our boys this weekend, in regards to eating out. We talked about it and decided that we need to work on their table manners at home a little more. At home, we don't mind if one of them gets up from the table because "xyz" but now we think we need to be more strict about sitting properly at our dinner table, in hopes that they will then sit better at a dinner table in a restaurant. Not sure how your household is at your dinner table, but thought I'd pass that along. Best of luck!
I completely understand & I did find a great book by Jo Frost a.k.a Super Nanny. It's recommended on my blog. I don't know if it will hit every area you're talking about but I found it very interesting & it did help me with a few discipline issues with Presley. It's called "Super Nanny how to get the best from your kids" by Jo Frost. Enjoy your camping trip.
We rarely go out! LOL Matt and Josh are quite the hooligans. But now that matt is 3 we are working harder on it and it's getting better! So there's hope girl! :)xoxox
Hey Amanda!
I don't have tons of advice (since I don't have angels either!) but I did want to tell you that you are NOT ALONE! :) We struggle with going out too. Hate it because I feel like we get punished because we don't get to go, but also feel like it really isn't fun for the kids, so I can kinda understand their trouble sitting still. I too struggle with days where I am just not "into my kids" at all. When we start thinking about baby #3 I have a bad day and think "What am I thinking? I can't handle 2!" So...hang in there, I'll say a little prayer for you everytime I pray for myself! I do have Jo Frost's first book which I have found many helpful things in. You are more than welcome to borrow it if you'd like! Just say the word!
I don't have any great advice for ya... we had a similar experience with Elliot this weekend too, luckily everyone around us thought it was funny instaed of annoying, my only suggestion would be not to give up on going out, practive makes perfect (or at least better), or so I've heard! I don't know of any great books either. I've done the love and logic class and read a book, it's got some great ideas, but you take what works for you in the end. You know your kids better than any author. I totally understand being frustrated at times too and thinking "What in the world am I going to do with another one", I just keep praying that God knows what He's doing and will grant me the patience to deal with whatever he gives me!
Sounds like Kyle's grandpa has a great voice between you and Sarah both, now I'm curious! Nice that you were able to enjoy the service w/o kids!
Oh, and so excited to hear your scrapping news... fun stuff!
Hey girl,
Just had a great time hanging with your lovely children at Grammy's house...not a moment of sibling rivalry. I think the solution is that you need a couple of my kids to come play with them every day...tee hee!!
Anyway, you know Brian said each time we were pregnant that we would never be able to go out to eat again with the kids, but we still do. They go through stages where they can't sit but it always seems to get better. My advice - pack the small containers of play dough or silly putty, or something else that only comes out to play at restaurants. It might work for a time or two! Sometimes we just opt for McDonalds or Wendy's on the family nights out so we can get in and out fast but at least I don't have to clean. And you know me and Tres Lobos - they are quick and have live entertainment to keep the kiddos busy (Nina, no comments here about the food!).
Okay and lastly - you must come and pick up my Sacred Parenting book. Can't believe I didn't share it with you before. It's by Gary Thomas. He also wrote Sacred Marriage (excellent book too). I loved it because it's not the typical parenting book that tells you what to do to get perfectly compliant children (which doesn't usually work and leaves you feeling like a failure). It focuses on why God gave you the children and personalies He did and what you can learn from it. It reminds us that parenting is a blessing from God. I remember one psychologist we heard calling parenting a "God-blessed opportunity." A good reminder for me to change my attitude about parenting. Oh yes, there are times when I say ditto to everything you mentioned here...parenting is soooo hard for sure. Finally, remember you are pregnant and you are allowed an extra amount of 'shortness'. Your kids won't remember those times anyway so don't fret!
By the way, you obviously wrote about a topic we can all relate to as moms (judging by the lengthy comments)...you are not alone and we are probably not as patient as you might think! Don't be so hard on yourself. Love ya - Tam
Wow! Thanks for posting that post because I have enjoyed reading everyone's comments and advice for myself!!!! You know I think you have perfect angels! I adore your children and last night was the first time I have even witnessed Selah being a little spitfire. :-) When you figure how to handle yours, let me know and I'll apply what you learn to Sadie! I thought I knew how to parent until she came along... :) Oh my! I think you and Kyle are awesome parents!!! God definitely thinks so since he continues to bless you with children. I agree with Tammy- things probably bother you more now since you are pregnant. This too shall pass. :-)
when our kiddies were at that age we just didn't eat out. we had to wait until they were a little older and could wait patiently for food to come. carter is now almost three and he does really well in a restaurant now.
We go out every weekend, but we only go to places that are loud already as it is, so when isa starts "talk screaming" no one really cares. LOL It does get limited to the places we can eat, but parenthood is full of compromises and sacrafices.
You guys are GREAT parents and I know you love the girls so much!!
There is one book that I am looking at getting myself, but haven't been able to find it. It's called Parenting With Fire: Lighting Up the Family with Passion and Inspiration by Shmuley Boteach. He is a Rabbi with 8 kids, and always has great advise.!! If you see that one, let me know. :)
Your doing great Manda, your kids are amazing!!
xoxox
I am not going to write a lenghty post because I think that I would just be repeating everything that everyone else said. So, "ditto" to what everyone else said. You are great parents, I struggle with the exact same things so I know where you are coming from, and like Tam said - don't be so hard on yourself. I do have one book suggestion for you. It's called, "It Takes a Parent" by Betsy Hart. She is great at empowering parents and kinda goes back to the way our parents were raised and even the way we were raised. The sub-title describes the book well: "How the Culture of Pushover Parenting is Hurting our Kids - and What to Do About It". I heard her speak at the conference I went to in Chicago and I knew that I just had to have her book. You can check out her website at http://betsyhart.net. And, if you want to borrow my book, you may gladly do so. I am not much into reading so it hasn't been on the top of my list of things to do. :)
So much for not being long :)
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